Journals18
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Bored and Missing
2 min read
I've been so bore lately, My day rutine is so boring. Every day i wake up, go to class (M, W, F), check tumblr, deviant art, and whatnot for an hour or so, then cook between 1:30 to 3 something depending when i start (which i've been getting better XD), eat with my dad, watch tv while we eat, he sleeps for half an hour then goes for my mom. i go to my room, use the computer for 3 hours, with my mom besides me (because she wants to spend time with me, even when i don't want to, but she's right, we need to "bond" and if we don't she'll feel sad because i don't want to and blablabal) then i hava a shower and i make my dinner, and stay up until 12 or 1.
i only have an hour and a half to talk outside of my family. when i talk to friends on facebook or something, i want to see them in that moment. i mean i know i didn't have a big social life when i was in high school, but i feel like a loser now. i miss my friends, i miss laughing in the class, i miss watching movies at literature. i miss roquemania. i want to make plans with my friends but some of them live far from where i live. and i already made some plans but for next weekend. i want to see them now!!!
the only thing that helps me to be kinda sane is my music, because when a good cames up and i'm on my room; i'm singing, dancing and jumping all round my room. but isn't enough.
if you guys see this (hugo,mario) i want to tell you that I FREAKING MISS YOU!!!!!!!!
hugo, my dear husband haha i miss the way you made me laugh when i was angry, i miss you ramdonness, i just miss you, like i said before, you're the brother i always wanted and never had.
mario, i miss your huggs, also your ramdonness, i miss seeing you drawing on your note books, i miss how we talk about nonesense, i miss everything.
i hope you're doing well all over there, and please say hi to bayliss (did i spell it right?? haha)
i only have an hour and a half to talk outside of my family. when i talk to friends on facebook or something, i want to see them in that moment. i mean i know i didn't have a big social life when i was in high school, but i feel like a loser now. i miss my friends, i miss laughing in the class, i miss watching movies at literature. i miss roquemania. i want to make plans with my friends but some of them live far from where i live. and i already made some plans but for next weekend. i want to see them now!!!
the only thing that helps me to be kinda sane is my music, because when a good cames up and i'm on my room; i'm singing, dancing and jumping all round my room. but isn't enough.
if you guys see this (hugo,mario) i want to tell you that I FREAKING MISS YOU!!!!!!!!
hugo, my dear husband haha i miss the way you made me laugh when i was angry, i miss you ramdonness, i just miss you, like i said before, you're the brother i always wanted and never had.
mario, i miss your huggs, also your ramdonness, i miss seeing you drawing on your note books, i miss how we talk about nonesense, i miss everything.
i hope you're doing well all over there, and please say hi to bayliss (did i spell it right?? haha)
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Just as this font name I'm using at word, I'm writing stuff, random stuff. Letting the words flow out of my system, and express how I really feel right now. Writing what I can't say out loud, even if a want to.
At first I was excited that I didn't have class today; I had my day planed, well I knew what I like to do. On Tuesday I was I the mood of reading. And since I'm a HA! fan I wanted to read one of my favorites, but since I already had read the short ones I read one of the (sort of) long ones; supernova one of my top ten.
It was late to read all of it, so I only read 7 chapters. On Wednesday all I wanted to do was to finish it on the or in two free classes, but the internet of my school didn't let me. When I get home I ate and ran to my room and started to read. As a teenage girl I was thrilled with every mushy, corny and sweet stuff it said, dreaming that maybe one day that could happen to me (maybe not exactly like that but you get it), but then at 8 I was tired, I didn't want to read anymore, but just when the story was getting good and yet the one thing I didn't want to read, because it was the saddest part of all the story. I forced myself to read more, at least to finish the chapter, and I did I finished the 17th, where all the drama began.
Today I waked up by force; I didn't want to sleep all day long. I started reading at 10 am. I could say that I cried, but because what was happening on the story is going to happen to me, sort of. The thing is that on December I'm going away; I'm leaving my parents, my family, even my dog; to have a better life, to study my career in another country and maybe stay and start a new life there.
Well on the story he just left to find his parents and he was saying goodbye to his friends and¿ his grandparents that raised him since his were missing ever since we was a baby. So that part was the most hurtful because the love of his life didn't show up to say goodbye at the airport. Even that I'm not in love or whatever, I cried at the thought of saying goodbye to my parents after having my last days with them on a place I don't know to well, finally leaving the nest.
And again I force myself to finish the last 4 chapters, feeling a little better and yet sad. I didn't want to read, sleep, watch a movie or anything I love to do. I had 8 good hours to spend in whatever I wanted to but all I wanted was a hug, I guess, I'm still not sure.
I'm confused of what I'm feeling, I'm excited that I'm leaving, and yet I'm sad, but not so much to pour my heart out. I'm sad because in less of a year I'm leaving, not seeing my family, friends again, and in 5 weeks I will be done with high school.
It's supposed that your high school graduation is one of the best days of your life because it means you're all group up, getting to college, finally making decisions by your own. But also o say goodbye, and that is my case, I won't be able to see y friends since they will be busy studying their careers in my last months here. Either way I'm never comfortable on graduations since I can remember. For my family I'm the center of attention and I don't want to be it. They sat how proud are of me and all that stuff and I'm like "… Hehe… uh…Thanks? "
In that dreadful day I have to doll up to just deal with awkward conversations like that. The last two graduations I had were "ugh", I don't even want to think about it. As same with this one, I don't want to go to church one hour to not hear whatever they're going to talk to and I don't want to be in a stupid party were I won't enjoy it!!!
It's a shame that I'm almost done paying my part and I can't take it back. I was doing this because my mom asked to do it for my family since I'm going away, but just yesterday she offered me if I don't it's necessary to go, even if we already paid. So I don't know, but I'm almost sure that I won't go.
As I said a year ago, if I'm freaking out like this today how I'm going to be in 5 weeks and then in 6-7 months?
It's obvious that I'm counting the days to happen, like my life would start there and I'm just here preparing for it; willing to come now and yet I don't want it to come so soon. I guess I'm really a basket case haha.
At first I was excited that I didn't have class today; I had my day planed, well I knew what I like to do. On Tuesday I was I the mood of reading. And since I'm a HA! fan I wanted to read one of my favorites, but since I already had read the short ones I read one of the (sort of) long ones; supernova one of my top ten.
It was late to read all of it, so I only read 7 chapters. On Wednesday all I wanted to do was to finish it on the or in two free classes, but the internet of my school didn't let me. When I get home I ate and ran to my room and started to read. As a teenage girl I was thrilled with every mushy, corny and sweet stuff it said, dreaming that maybe one day that could happen to me (maybe not exactly like that but you get it), but then at 8 I was tired, I didn't want to read anymore, but just when the story was getting good and yet the one thing I didn't want to read, because it was the saddest part of all the story. I forced myself to read more, at least to finish the chapter, and I did I finished the 17th, where all the drama began.
Today I waked up by force; I didn't want to sleep all day long. I started reading at 10 am. I could say that I cried, but because what was happening on the story is going to happen to me, sort of. The thing is that on December I'm going away; I'm leaving my parents, my family, even my dog; to have a better life, to study my career in another country and maybe stay and start a new life there.
Well on the story he just left to find his parents and he was saying goodbye to his friends and¿ his grandparents that raised him since his were missing ever since we was a baby. So that part was the most hurtful because the love of his life didn't show up to say goodbye at the airport. Even that I'm not in love or whatever, I cried at the thought of saying goodbye to my parents after having my last days with them on a place I don't know to well, finally leaving the nest.
And again I force myself to finish the last 4 chapters, feeling a little better and yet sad. I didn't want to read, sleep, watch a movie or anything I love to do. I had 8 good hours to spend in whatever I wanted to but all I wanted was a hug, I guess, I'm still not sure.
I'm confused of what I'm feeling, I'm excited that I'm leaving, and yet I'm sad, but not so much to pour my heart out. I'm sad because in less of a year I'm leaving, not seeing my family, friends again, and in 5 weeks I will be done with high school.
It's supposed that your high school graduation is one of the best days of your life because it means you're all group up, getting to college, finally making decisions by your own. But also o say goodbye, and that is my case, I won't be able to see y friends since they will be busy studying their careers in my last months here. Either way I'm never comfortable on graduations since I can remember. For my family I'm the center of attention and I don't want to be it. They sat how proud are of me and all that stuff and I'm like "… Hehe… uh…Thanks? "
In that dreadful day I have to doll up to just deal with awkward conversations like that. The last two graduations I had were "ugh", I don't even want to think about it. As same with this one, I don't want to go to church one hour to not hear whatever they're going to talk to and I don't want to be in a stupid party were I won't enjoy it!!!
It's a shame that I'm almost done paying my part and I can't take it back. I was doing this because my mom asked to do it for my family since I'm going away, but just yesterday she offered me if I don't it's necessary to go, even if we already paid. So I don't know, but I'm almost sure that I won't go.
As I said a year ago, if I'm freaking out like this today how I'm going to be in 5 weeks and then in 6-7 months?
It's obvious that I'm counting the days to happen, like my life would start there and I'm just here preparing for it; willing to come now and yet I don't want it to come so soon. I guess I'm really a basket case haha.
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it could be worse, i know
4 min read
well today when i wake up, i wasn't sleepy. so that was excellent at the moment. the first classes were ok, like always. but then at the 4th and 5th period ther was an exam for some students in my high. my teacher send my group to another classroom so she could have "peace". since the teacher who looking us for her, couldn't talk, so it was really odd that in a moment of the class everyone was quiet, doing their work. at the time i was a little pissed off because they didn't shut the hell up.
the 4th periond end i went for my books. we had some questions to look for in the class, and since one of my classmetes left my high school, everyone else in asking me to help them sometimes, they think i'm a freaking genius when i'm not, i just do the work they they ask me to. but at the time my classmstes were talking and talking again, i couldn't stand it. they were talking about pure trash (instead of other freaking word) and then one of them ask me if i knew if the answer of one question hoping for me to say it but not expecting it really. And i just said "do you think i'm in the mood to answer you!?!?" he whole room wa sin silence lucky for me the teacher wasn't ther at the moment. i could feel all the eyes on me, it is really rare for me to be angry at school. i'm the quiet one, shy, and whatnot.
when i told him that, i could feel my voice tremble but it came out so serious and clear (well that's how i hear it) it felt so wierd and yet i let it out. and i wasn't angry, if i were i would let it all aout, really screaming in to his face to shut the hell up, and how could they talk about trash, in that way they never get a girlfriend ect...
when i turned back tu my desk, everybody continue as i didn't say anything, but it was sure that they were thinking of it. i continue my work still angry, trying to calm myself, sayin they're just talking like you do sometimes, having fun in class, but it didn't help at all. the class ended and on the next one other classmate ask. Hey, angie was so mad. when i was two seat beside him. everybody laugh when he realized i was there i just look at him with a smile that say "i'm here, you know!!" they asked me why i was mad, but i didn't answer, or say i never seen you like that before, i could swear that i had my face that said bite me all over.
i relaxed in two classes, and the last 2 i was already laughing with the guys, and then again they asked why i was mad, now that i was calm i said that i was tired of them to talk about trash and that they didn't work as much as others... luckly a usb hurled to one of them really fast (but didn't hit him), changing the subject (for my relief) all of us freak out. and i was laughing, i could stop, because ealier not remember when excatly i said to H that if he spin the usb he could get hurt, like my cousin. i could stop laughing of the irony, he just asked me is this the way your cousin got hurt. thanks to them all my anger went out (today)
at the end of the day i was joking on drama, singing, and whatnot. i even know what part of the play i want now!! so this day didn't go as planed, but it could be worse, right?
*´¨)
¸.•´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ angie93
the 4th periond end i went for my books. we had some questions to look for in the class, and since one of my classmetes left my high school, everyone else in asking me to help them sometimes, they think i'm a freaking genius when i'm not, i just do the work they they ask me to. but at the time my classmstes were talking and talking again, i couldn't stand it. they were talking about pure trash (instead of other freaking word) and then one of them ask me if i knew if the answer of one question hoping for me to say it but not expecting it really. And i just said "do you think i'm in the mood to answer you!?!?" he whole room wa sin silence lucky for me the teacher wasn't ther at the moment. i could feel all the eyes on me, it is really rare for me to be angry at school. i'm the quiet one, shy, and whatnot.
when i told him that, i could feel my voice tremble but it came out so serious and clear (well that's how i hear it) it felt so wierd and yet i let it out. and i wasn't angry, if i were i would let it all aout, really screaming in to his face to shut the hell up, and how could they talk about trash, in that way they never get a girlfriend ect...
when i turned back tu my desk, everybody continue as i didn't say anything, but it was sure that they were thinking of it. i continue my work still angry, trying to calm myself, sayin they're just talking like you do sometimes, having fun in class, but it didn't help at all. the class ended and on the next one other classmate ask. Hey, angie was so mad. when i was two seat beside him. everybody laugh when he realized i was there i just look at him with a smile that say "i'm here, you know!!" they asked me why i was mad, but i didn't answer, or say i never seen you like that before, i could swear that i had my face that said bite me all over.
i relaxed in two classes, and the last 2 i was already laughing with the guys, and then again they asked why i was mad, now that i was calm i said that i was tired of them to talk about trash and that they didn't work as much as others... luckly a usb hurled to one of them really fast (but didn't hit him), changing the subject (for my relief) all of us freak out. and i was laughing, i could stop, because ealier not remember when excatly i said to H that if he spin the usb he could get hurt, like my cousin. i could stop laughing of the irony, he just asked me is this the way your cousin got hurt. thanks to them all my anger went out (today)
at the end of the day i was joking on drama, singing, and whatnot. i even know what part of the play i want now!! so this day didn't go as planed, but it could be worse, right?
*´¨)
¸.•´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ angie93
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Wicked Awesome XD
2 min read
this week was and is so freaking good!!!!
for some simple reasons
. i didn't have clases on monday for the centary of the revolution
. i was so excited cause i buy tickets for Harry Potter
. i saw Harry Potter 7 at 12:40 in the morning, i slept only 3 hrs hahaha i was
like this ain thew whole movie
. then i didn't had clases cuase i went to the faculty of visual arts, were my father study, i was so proud of him
. tommorow i'm going to lose 3 or more clases for an event in my high school, i'm gonna get late
. there was a new episode of the simpsons, which was kinda wierd for me hahaha
. today glee 2 season started today (in Mexico)
in conclusion this week is so wicked awesome!!!!!
for some simple reasons
. i didn't have clases on monday for the centary of the revolution
. i was so excited cause i buy tickets for Harry Potter
. i saw Harry Potter 7 at 12:40 in the morning, i slept only 3 hrs hahaha i was
like this ain thew whole movie. then i didn't had clases cuase i went to the faculty of visual arts, were my father study, i was so proud of him
. tommorow i'm going to lose 3 or more clases for an event in my high school, i'm gonna get late
. there was a new episode of the simpsons, which was kinda wierd for me hahaha
. today glee 2 season started today (in Mexico)
in conclusion this week is so wicked awesome!!!!!
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for a while
1 min read
well just for you to know, i won't be here as i used to be.... why??
cause i don't have internet on my house, so i have to use my mom's computer but she needs it to work... and i don't like it so much both it's the only way to be here...
well i only want you to know.
cause i don't have internet on my house, so i have to use my mom's computer but she needs it to work... and i don't like it so much both it's the only way to be here...
well i only want you to know.
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